Apple’s iOS 7 goes live tomorrow. What will it mean for enterprises?

Well, you couldn’t tell from Apple’s consumer-focused media event last Tuesday where they discussed the new iPhone 5c and iPhone 5s at length. So where can you get the lowdown on all the really great enterprise-level business features that are actually baked into iOS 7? From the folks at Responsive Delivery solution provider Moovweb, of course.

From Moovweb’s land of make-believe comes a creative info-parody entitled, “The iOS 7 Apple Event for the Enterprise (that never happened).” In their rendition, they reimagine Apple’s iOS 7 event as if it took place in a parallel universe where the audience had been filled with CIOs instead of techy reporters. In the info-parody, Apple announced the fingerprint sensor in the new iPhone 5s, BYOD, iBeacons, iWork, Per App VPN, MDM deployments, and Single Sign On.

To see how the info-parody explained these real iOS 7 features and how they affect the enterprise, the following was copied from the info-parody’s transcript:

The fingerprint sensor in the new iPhone 5s: “This might be the single greatest gift any mobile device has ever given the enterprise: Finally, authentication that your busy and harried employees will actually use. Now you can go back to worrying about terrible passwords on their laptops.”

iWork: “We’ve bypassed your procurement department that only buys Office. iWork is now free on your employees’ phones, and now it’s in their browser on the desktop. It won’t be taking over your company, but expect motivated employees to dip their toes in, especially if your existing enterprise tools aren’t cloud-ready.”

Apps and books purchased through the Volume Purchase Program: “These stay with the company and not the employee. So when someone leaves your company, you can reassign that license to another employee.”

BYOD: “BYOD doesn’t have to translate into putting your data at risk. The IT department can now prevent accidental data leakage by controlling which apps on a user’s phone are allowed to open corporate attachments. That financial forecast you e-mailed is no longer a single, dangerous tap away from ending up on Twitter.”